30 November 2009

So much learning

This semester is definitely one of the most difficult that I've ever taken. Actually, it's probably the absolute worst semester to date and if I have anything to say about it the worst semester I will ever have.

As soon as I am done with papers/finals I plan on getting things super organized so I can stay on top of things next semester. I somehow ended up with even more classes next semester than this one.

22 November 2009

Do you happen to remember me saying something about a boy who asked me out who I wasn't so sure about?

Things have kind of done a 180, and I'm exhilaratingly terrified.

19 November 2009

It is what it is.

Overanalyzing things is way over rated, and just going with it is totally better. I've been just going with it since my last post, and I have to say that I'm damn happy with how that's going. I guess we'll just have to keep this up and see how things continue.

I'm having a rough semester otherwise though, and I've made some decisions that are a bit disappointing, but will probably work better in the long run. Once I get through this essay that is seriously one of the worst I've ever written I may be able to say more.

17 November 2009

There's something wrong with me

Totally into me
Has a Job
Has his own place

Can someone please explain to me how Double Champ can be almost everything I've ever wanted (as in definitely 8 of the things listed above and maybe more), and yet I'm still not so sure that this is going to last?

16 November 2009

New Name!

Shadow Boy is getting a new name. It's not the most anonymous name, as anyone who actually knows him will probably figure it out in .7 seconds, but SB just has a negative vibe to it, whereas Double Champ does not. So, for the two of you who know him, could I be a little more obvious?

After the walk in the rain on Wednesday night he kissed me, and then he hung out with me and some friends at my place on Thursday. He kissed me that night too, after I got rid of the last friend rather hastily. Friday night there was the usual hanging out at Hangar 17 followed by food at my place and some more kissing, and on Saturday he actually stayed over, but only because it was so damn cold! Last night he accompanied me to Safeway to get some food for studying, and he's on his way over now to hang out for a bit before I kick him out to write a paper.

He's definitely way more into me than I am him, but I'm going with it for now and seeing how it goes. Hopefully it doesn't end in flames.

12 November 2009

Shadow Boy seems to be stepping into the light a bit.

I don't think I know enough to share any more at the moment.

10 November 2009

I figured it out!

I've been getting a little frustrated with the attention that I've been getting because of the hair. I love the hair, and I think that the color works well for me, but I get much more attention than I thought I would and I couldn't understand why. Lots of people have different colors in their hair, why should it be such a big deal?

It all connected for me today though, when I saw a guy whose hair was so obviously dyed black it was almost painful and he was giving me the same stare that most people do. It's the style! My hair is green, but I still dress and style my hair as though I'm on my way to be a soccer mom in the next 7 years. The incongruity is what's throwing people off!

People don't know what to think of me. Am I a little punk with green/blue hair, or am I a "typical" middle class white girl who conforms to society's expectations?

Hopefully this new understanding will allow me to not mind the looks so much. I think I'll have to wait until Thursday to really know since it's so late now and tomorrow is a holiday and I won't be going out in public much, especially with the painting of a house taking place and all.

09 November 2009

Don't Forget to be Awesome!

I really need to get to bed so I can get up tomorrow and take care of the kinds of things that I've been procrastinating for a few weeks. If you haven't figured it out, when I procrastinate doing homework, I also avoid blogging because I feel a bit guilty about doing something that I enjoy when I'm not doing things that I'm obligated to do.

Sometimes I still write things though, and I just don't post them. Like the following letter to Hank Green.

* * * *

An open letter (because I haven't showered and making a video would be a bad idea at the moment) to Hank Green regarding tribes.

I'd watched Seth Godin's talk before seeing your video, and I got a slightly different idea about the tribes he describes from that video. I have yet to go back and watch his talk again, and as such I may ultimately end up agreeing with your interpretation more, but right now I'd like to discuss the differences for a moment.

You mention that as Nerdfighters, we are a tribe. I get that, I like that, I'm behind it, but it's not what I initially thought Godin was referring to. Instead, I understood him to be pretty much different personality types, and the tribes themselves are the 5 types of people, or rather their outlooks.

I still agree that many a nerdfighter is in the 4th type and very supportive of the world around them. Go us! I just don't think that it's being a nerdfighter that puts us into that category, I think us being in that category allow us to be awesome nerdfighters. In some ways it's like the houses at Hogwarts. An individual's outlook and initial responses to something determine which tribe they belong in.

The great thing about writing and creating characters as JK Rowling has, is that she can allow many of her characters to actually be pretty awesome. I would argue that all three non-dark houses are at least level three tribe types, while to over simplify it Slytherin is a type 1. It is because these characters are already in these tribes that they are put together.

Having written this and thought about it a bit since I wrote what is above, I'm not so strong in my stance anymore. I think it's a bit of both views (and probably has aspects of other takes as well, I just haven't heard those ones yet)!

I would love to think about this more, and I probably will while in class tomorrow, but I'd like to get this posted before I totally forget about it. Also, seeing the video you shared on Twitter tonight made me think of just how great a type 4 tribe ALL of You Tube can be, posting now seems timely.

Any of your thoughts on this would be welcomed, with some luck I will be able to discuss this with you on Friday in San Francisco! (I'm a little bummed that I found out about this later than I wanted and wasn't able to contact you about the music store I work for near Sacramento who would have loved to have you come play in the store. If you're driving to SF, we'll be on your way, feel free to contact me if you're interested in possibly something last minute.)


PS. I really kind of wanted to sign that "One of the Abundance," but I thought that might be better in a letter to John.

* * * *

For those who are unfamiliar, this is the video he posted, and I can't wait to buy the song. Even if I only listen to it when I want pure cheese, that's not what this is about!

03 November 2009

It ain't easy being green.

I walked through several stores in the mall today. Normally I get asked almost right away in any store if I'd like help or whatever. I'm normally very polite in saying no, or try to think of a question for them because I know that I certainly hate to have to offer people customer service like that. Today though, I got nothing.

Apparently that is not someone who looks like they could possibly be spending money. Unless of course they're in Sephora. Even there though, I didn't get asked if I needed help, I got told that my hair was awesome.

Since I actually did have a question or two for some people today, I'm a little annoyed at the change of attention. I kind of wonder what the motivation for change was.

I'm really kind of liking the blue, but I don't think that it's because of the hue. (Hehe.) I think what I like is a slightly darker shade to kind of frame my face. I really love my blonde when I'm a bit more tan and there's more of a difference between my skin and hair shades, but that's not quite right for fall/winter. I'm paler now, and I want to go darker!

Not exactly dark, more like my natural dark blonde/light brown hair with a hint of auburn in it. Kind of like Amy Adams in Sunshine Cleaning, but with more light in it. Courtney can handle I'm sure!

Things I'm not so great at...

remembering to take the trash down to the curb when it's full.
motivating myself to do my schoolwork.
letting go.